Colors and Crawlspaces

You can hide from the world in a lot of places. Some hide in their homes, like a recluse. Some people hide in their careers, and build a world they like for themselves. Other people hide in their characters, and make a world of their own, for the world, or themselves to see. I hide where ever I am. Today I was in a crawl space. I ended up in the dark, damp, muddy space by chance. I stayed for a while because I liked it. I liked the chance to get away. To imagine what would happen next, or what could be for me. I have been looking for a chance to start over for a while, and my have found it in a crawlspace!

Whats not to be learned from this scene? I never would have imagined being here this morning. I NEVER would have imagined choosing to stay longer than necessary! The strangest thing hit me while I was down there. It was silent, dark, and alone. I am a person who can not stand to be alone. I need to be around friends, and people in general. I used to hide in a crowd. I loved the anonymity I found in a group. But lately that has not worked for me. I still haven't gotten back on the right track, and in the darkness and silence, I was forced to think about my situations. I was forced to plan my way out. Not only out of the crawlspace, but out of this life. To find my way into the life I need!! I can not tell you that I have found it yet, but I have found a new approach to that place! 

I have found a way to change my skin, and change my colors! That is my real hand, with real labor all over them. And I will use them to build my new life, and get where I need to be!!